Help, she hates the water!!

cmw5682 · Post by **cmw5682** » Fri Feb 27, 2015 4:22 pm

I need your help!! A friend and I were all ready to book our St. John vacation but a third friend really wants to come too. The only problem is she's not in to laying on the beach all day which is all I do on island. Will she be bored on St. John or should we do St. Croix instead which has more excursions like Tan Tan Tours? What is there on St. John for those odd ducks not interested in laying in the water all day??

Lovermont · Post by **Lovermont** » Fri Feb 27, 2015 4:54 pm

Well, if she is a bit athletic, you could arm her with a Trail Bandit map http://www.trailbandit.org, and she could hike to her heart's content. You could plan your beaches based on where she would be hiking, ie: you hang at Salt Pond, and she can hike over to Drunk Bay and out to Ram Head. You go to Watermelon, and she can hike up to the Murphy Estate House ruins, and even all the way to Brown Bay if she wants. You visit Little Lameshur, and she can hike to Reef Bay and the Petroglyphs.
And, although I've never done it, how about suggesting kayaking, either from Crabby's in Coral Bay, or at Cinnamon Bay.
I think in the end, if she's expressed interest in joining you on a trip to a tropical island, she must know that there'll be a bit of sitting around on beaches.

loria · Post by **loria** » Fri Feb 27, 2015 4:55 pm

lovermont has it right-- there is silting, paddle boarding, kayaking, motor boats, hiking, shopping, horseback riding, yoga, spa stuff, etc, etc.... there is a world of things to do that are not lying on the beach!

Marcia (Mrs. Pete) · Post by **Marcia (Mrs. Pete)** » Fri Feb 27, 2015 6:14 pm

She could also take the ferry over to STT and enjoy shopping, touring historic sites...all kinds of things! There is a TON to do on STT if STJ is not her pace.

mahojim · Post by **mahojim** » Fri Feb 27, 2015 6:38 pm

I wouldn't do it.
No disrespect intended.
Why is she going?
It's an island.
Had a miserable experience with a couple who "had to go", and they ended up hating everything.
Lost their friendship when we got home. They knew what they were getting into, but "had to go." She didn't like the beach, and he didn't like the heat and swimming. Still, we booked it, and went to that wonderful little place.
It was a perplexing situation that I don't wish on anyone. STJ is small, but staying in a villa and sharing a Jeep with folks who don't "get it", is the biggest claustrophobic disappointment that I've ever been through. Was a wasted trip, honestly. Sadly, I'll never forget how lousy that trip was.
Then again, what the hell do I know? Meet Sloop? Josephine? Ruth and Ron?
Take her hiking...?
Good luck.
Smiles-
MJ

Charlie2001 · Post by **Charlie2001** » Fri Feb 27, 2015 7:02 pm

I have to agree with Mahojim. Best case is that you'll be stressed out over dropping her off wherever she wants to go, then worry about picking her up, timeframes, etc each day. Worst case is likely worse that what he described.

I've got plenty of friends that I LOVE hanging out with at home, but the vast majority are not the type who would "get it" on St John. Hence the reason my wife and I don't invite them to join us.

I used to vacation in the BVI with two other couples. We all had very similar attitudes and "got it", but even then there were tense times when folks got out of sync and had different expectations. Don't set yourself up for a nightmare with someone who is already clearly not going to "get it".

JJShaw · Post by **JJShaw** » Fri Feb 27, 2015 8:52 pm

I would just tell her..." You are welcome to come...but...we spend alot of time in the water and unless you are happy just lying on the beach i'm not sure you would enjoy it..and I would hate for you to go to the expense and not have a good time"
At least she would know what she is getting into before hand, My mom wanted to bring my niece and then said...she wont wanna snorkel...I said..well she can sit on the beach with you or ya'll can shop or stay at the villa...because you know what we do when we are there...and I've told my oldest son as well, "if you dont like the heat, humidity and the beach...you better not go"...I love him with all my being but I know if I took him to STJ I'd likely have him killed or he'd have my killed...either way we'd both be miserable..and it would be a wasted trip..so he stays home and I go visit him or he visits here... and we both survive..

NJsurfsup · Post by **NJsurfsup** » Sat Feb 28, 2015 8:34 am

Why does she want to go if she is not a beach person? Did she indicate that she wanted you to change plans or was she already prepared to do her own thing?
I would not change my plans and would be quite clear on them up front.

Lovermont · Post by **Lovermont** » Sat Feb 28, 2015 12:36 pm

OMG... I just noticed I typed "Watermelon" instead of "Waterlemon". What a rookie mistake. Next thing you know I'll be saying St. John's and Rams Head (which I'll point out is one of my pet peeves, because it's Ram Head.)
OK... good luck with your friend. I hope it all works out. I can't fathom someone who wouldn't love STJ, but I guess they exist.

Chris @ Work · Post by **Chris @ Work** » Sat Feb 28, 2015 2:59 pm

Have to agree with mahojim on this one as well.
We have friends and family who always tells us to "bring them down next time" but we know they would quickly get bored or complain of the weather. We would end up spending the whole time trying to make sure they were enjoying themselves or seeing everything they could get into the time on island and that is not what we go to STJ for.
Find the most polite way to avoid that situation but avoid you must.

Teresa_Rae · Post by **Teresa_Rae** » Sat Feb 28, 2015 11:57 pm

Someone who hates the water and doesn't like lying around on the beach should probably stay at home

I never try to talk anyone into coming to STJ. If it's not their thing, it's not their thing, and that's fine.

chicagoans · Post by **chicagoans** » Mon Mar 02, 2015 3:22 pm

I'm with Mahojim, JJShaw and others. Let her know what you intend to do all day and if it's not what she wants to do, then at the very least she needs to rent her own vehicle. Then she can do other stuff to her heart's content and you all can meet up for happy hour or dinner. Just please, don't change your vacation for her or make yourself crazy carting her all over the island because she doesn't want to hang on the beach.

Maybe you can share a day together at Cinnamon so she can kayak or SUP while you hang out. But if she hates the water, will she even want to go boating?

I think you need to find out how she envisions the trip and if that meshes with what your plans are.

Agent99 · Post by **Agent99** » Mon Mar 02, 2015 5:16 pm

I am totally with Maho Jim and others. If she decides to hike or whatever while you guys are beaching whatever you do keep in control of the vehicle so you can come and go as you please. If you do this set the guidelines early. Either she should get her own car or take cabs to where she wants to go. Nights could be fun and easy but remember that this is your hard earned vacation and you should not have to be responsible for anyone else having a good time.

jmq · Post by **jmq** » Wed Mar 04, 2015 11:17 am

Hey Jim - I found the old thread where I think you first you told that story and others chimed in about the pitfalls of bringing newbies to the island...its fun reading.

http://www.virgin-islands-on-line.com/v ... PcvQebF-So

mahojim · Post by **mahojim** » Wed Mar 04, 2015 11:34 am

That's exactly the trip that I was talking about, JMQ.
It can be a rude awakening, unfortunately!
Smiles-
MJ

usvi-on-line