The Festivus Thread

[Xislandgirl]

On the millionth day of angry, I said to myself

If you don't give me ideas on what to buy your family members, I will buy crappy gifts that no one will ever like.

JUST FRIGGING TELL ME WHAT TO BUY!

[mbw1024]

On the millionth day of angry, I said to myself

If you don't give me ideas on what to buy your family members, I will buy crappy gifts that no one will ever like.

JUST FRIGGING TELL ME WHAT TO BUY!

hahahahahahahahahahaahaaa ok THAT just made me die laughing!

[Lulu76]

Gift cards. Just give them gift cards.

My parents received the flat screen TV yesterday that my siblings and I bought for them when we were there. My dad called me last night because he couldn't get the picture in picture to work and he could get it to work on his old TV and he wasn't sure this TV was better (even though all he talks about at anyone else's house is their flat screen TVs). I finally told him to call the Dish Network people because I didn't know.

Gift cards. Yep, next year everyone gets gift cards.

[PA Girl]

My mother's husband is a total asshole. There I said it...Dipstick is just too nice a word for this guy. He sits on the couch and eats constantly. In other words, he's a pig. Last year he didn't want to "interfere in the family conversation" so he put head phones on and wore them all day. He got mad because I yelled at him to keep his goddamn hands out of the shrimp cocktail until my brother and his family got here. As a form of protest he wore his headphones to the dinner table. I had a filet and cooked my ass off all day and he sits down with headphones on. My 14 year old nephew looked at me with this "Aunt Bev is gonna flip out look" and it was all I could do to control myself. I waited until everyone left and I ripped him a new one. Yep, Christmas pretty much sucks here.....

Your mom's husband might be related to my FIL. That is the type of crap he would have pulled.

[bevm]

I'm convinced he does this stuff on purpose so my mother won't want to come here for Christmas...

[pipanale]

hey Pip--you have a right to be upset--but try to look at it from their perspective (not your brother's-- the kids)Check this out -- when they probably just want to be home with their dad and their friends-- they are flying across the country to spend christmas with virtual strangers they have no connection to but thru a recent marriage--and with a mother who basically left them-if i were a 13 yr old or an 18 yr old (or anyone else for that matter)this would be the LAST place on earth that i would want to spend christmas--give me a hot poker for my eye--send me to the civil war in congo--anything.

and that's really the only thing hoping to bring to the table...trying to make them feel welcome. Uncie Baldo (as I'm known to the older one) and I will get along fine and I would like to take him to a strip club just to piss his mother off. the younger one (according to his mother) is quiet and more reserved....so she's bringing him straight into the eye of the Madness Storm.

Cuz otherwise, the holidays will be awash in yelling, barking dogs and me wishing I were anywhere but there.

The best 2 Christmasses ever were 2002 and 2005.

2002: A blizzard hit NJ and we were "trapped" at home all day with the baby. she slept all day and we drank wine and played scrabble next to the tree.

2005: Our first year in NC. It was warm and there was no family around.

Sense a trend?

[PA Girl]

I'm convinced he does this stuff on purpose so my mother won't want to come here for Christmas...

Oh, I don't doubt that one bit. Bad behavior is his way of controlling the situation by playing the victim. He can make everyone else look "bad" as in "see, they think they are better then me because they don't hog down shrimp and don't wear headphones at the table" which, of course, you are better then him because you don't act like a fool.

[Anthony]

My mother's husband is a total ...

LOL - you got me Bev... too much! Headphones! Wow...

[djmom]

Bev, there has got to be a way to turn this around on him. For example, have everyone wear headphones and you greet him at the door (as you are rocking out to some tune he can't hear) with yours on....Or you could stage a preplanned conversation where you "think" he can't hear you and you have something big time happen....or make two bowls of shrimp and put his name on one of them with big letters.... hmmm...

[djmom]

On the millionth day of angry, I said to myself

If you don't give me ideas on what to buy your family members, I will buy crappy gifts that no one will ever like.

JUST FRIGGING TELL ME WHAT TO BUY!

I suggest a Shamwow, Mighty Putty or Slap Chop for those people.

[spindrift]

Pip, take the high road here.

I think djmom said it best:

“But remember this is an opportunity for you to make a nice Christmas (I'm not talking money, I'm talking Christmas spirit) for those boys who had the unfortunate luck of being her kids. Maybe this is a chance for you to show by doing what a normal family does. And even if they don't express appreciation maybe they'll remember it and when they grow up will want to have a Christmas like a real family.”

"The high road is always respected… and integrity is always rewarded." S. Hamilton

[Xislandgirl]

I say screw the high road... in a sense.
It is your Christmas too. You have a lovely family that deserves to have a holiday that is worth remembering. I say plan your day around your family and let everyone else follow suit.
So many times, we all spend so much time and energy on making everyone else happy that we forget about ourselves, at least I know I do. I have decided that this year, I will plan things that make me the happiest and hope that that happiness spreads.

[djmom]

I think it is great to plan things that make you happy and we should do that way more often.

But once wheels have been set in motion, making the best of it seems to be a better approach than making ourselves miserable over it.

Then we lose by allowing someone to get to us.

Actually the Festivus is a wonderful idea for a "holiday" if grievances are aired and then we just get over it.

Just my opinion though. There aren't a lot of annoying people in my life so it is easier said than done I am sure. The most annoying one died and I would love to have another Christmas with her and all of the disruption she caused. I'd take it any day.

[spindrift]

I will always put the well-being of children first, and yes, I still consider an 18 and 13 year old to be in the “children category”. What is wrong with trying to make them feel welcomed at Christmas, too?

Xislandgirl, when you say “screw the high road”, it sounds rather Grinch-like to me.

[Xislandgirl]

I will always put the well-being of children first, and yes, I still consider an 18 and 13 year old to be in the “children category”. What is wrong with trying to make them feel welcomed at Christmas, too?

Xislandgirl, when you say “screw the high road”, it sounds rather Grinch-like to me.

Not Grinch like at all really. I am not saying that they should not feel welcomed, but Pip and his family should not have to change a bit about their holiday celebration to accomodate others. Many of us know some of the troubles that he has been through with his family and it always seems he is the one that bends over backwards to help people that generally don't "get it".
My suggestion to him was to plan a holiday for taht will be memorable for his immediate family. Perhaps when his invited guests see how happy they are, it will spread.
Just my .02.